Poetic Ramblings

outkast_choir89 @ 2009-06-14T13:07:00

2009-06-14T18:09:46Z

I have not updated in awhile. I just finished my first year of college and am working on a lot of fics at the moment. I'm working on my WIPS of course and also I have a new NCIS idea floating around that's Tony/Mcgee. I also have some good Spirk plot bunnies that are bugging me. Hopefully I'll be able to post a few fics soon. I also just nearly broke my finger. It's heavily bruised which makes it difficult to type quickly.

outkast_choir89 @ 2009-01-26T19:18:00

2009-01-27T01:19:36Z

Finding the City of Gold should be enough for Riley Poole, but as he opens the door to his dull apartment and looks around the boring living room he has an epiphany of sorts. It isn’t anything big, but it is big enough to warrant a new blog post on his MySpace page. He hasn’t been able to touch his laptop since after they found the cave leading to Cibola and it is slowly killing him. Riley Poole without his computer is like the Cookie Monster without his cookie, it just doesn’t work out very well. So Riley drops his luggage on the floor and pulls his laptop out of his messenger bag. Before heading over to the couch, he throws his messenger bag on the small kitchen table, grabs a Pepsi, and kicks his precious converse off. Riley curls up on his criminally comfortable couch and starts up the computer. While he waits for it to load, he drinks half off his Pepsi. He deserves as much caffeine as he wants after Benjamin Gates’ latest treasure hunt. Ben puts him through more shit than anyone he has ever known.‘Don’t think about,’ he thinks. ‘Save all of your anger for the blog post. It will be the most epic of posts that have ever been posted.’ His brain then follows that with, ‘What a geek!’ Riley sighs loudly at the same time his computer makes the most annoying noise ever, signaling to him that his computer is up and running. He quickly opens Internet Explorer and it comes up on his homepage which just so happens to be MySpace. He knows he’s like a 16-year-old girl when it comes to the addicting site, but he just can’t help that he’s a comment whore. He signs in, immediately goes to post a new blog and is forced with the problem that every blogger has, coming up with a subject. He tries to think of something witty and Riley like, but all he can come up with is, “I Found a Treasure, But Someone Took It from Me…Friggin’ Pirates”. Riley thinks how of how he should start and comes up with nothing. He’s not as good with words as he is with electronics. After what seems like forever, he decides just to write whatever comes into his mind and go over it when he’s done.

So it’s been awhile since my last blog entry. Between the book release and Cibola I have barely had time to check my email. You all know how much I hate not being able to just sit down and relax with my computer. Basically, it has been hell. There’s something I’d like to talk about that I’ve never really mentioned before. I had decided to never talk about this to anyone ever, but now it seems I have no choice. It is eating away at me and there’s no one to talk to. I can’t talk to my family, they hate me enough already. Why add insult to the injury? The only real people I talk to about any important stuff are Ben, Ben’s dad, Abigail, and now Ben’s mom. She <3’s me! Anywhoozle, none of them would understand. Ben’s mom would pity me. I hate that look people get when they pity someone. I got it enough from all the teachers when they noticed the bruises or how thin I was. But, that’s another story that I’m not likely to tell. Patrick, Ben’s dad would probably threaten me and never speak to me again. I don’t want him to hate me. Abigail is definitely not an option and Ben…well there is no way in hell I’m talking to him about this. He’d never look at me again. I can’t lose his friendship. He’s the only one I’ve got. So I figured if anyone would understand it’d be my fellow techies. You guys are great for this kind of stuff. I really do appreciate the past and future help. Also, thank you to those who have read my book or are in the process. None of my real acquaintances attempted to read it. That just shows how awesome you guys are. So back to Riley’s horrid problem that will never be known to anyone outside of MySpace. My biggest problem is part of something I like to call the Riley Poole Complex. In this complex I never get anything I want, everyone takes me for granted, and everything that goes wrong is my fault. I’ve had said complex since I was about 10.

Ok, I’m just going to say it. There’s this guy and he kind of took my heart. OMG, I just sounded like one of those girls who sit around on the computer looking at icons and reading fan fiction all day. What do you call them? Oh yeah! FANGIRLS!! OMG I SOUND LIKE A FRIGGIN’ FANGIRL! By the way, I didn’t know if any of you fan girls know this, but DiNozzo and McGee will never get together. McGee loves Abby and DiNozzo is a little too busy pinning for Gibbs. Same thing goes for House and Chase. Wilson and House love each other. Nothing will ever change that love. Holy shit! I AM A FANGIRL! I think I’ll go and die now. Ben was right I shouldn’t be on the computer every minute of my life. Speaking of Ben, so yeah I’m gay. A lot of you already knew that, but to some of you I suppose this is new. I’ve known I was gay since before Ben rescued me from that windowless cubicle. I would include Ian in there, but since he tried to kill me and all…well you know. I’ve never actually dated a guy, but I’ve had plenty of one-night stands. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to have a relationship, but only if it’s with him. I can’t love anyone else. I wish I could, because it’s obvious that he has little to no affection for me. I’m pretty sure he just tolerates me. He only needs me for certain things and then he just throws me away until he needs me again. He only calls or comes by when he needs me to do something for him. None of that matters though, since I’ll always do anything for him. Hopefully I’ll get hit by a truck or something. You know I thought I had found an out when we were searching for Cibola. Abigail pointed out that one of us would be stuck behind on that gold balance thingy. I jumped at the chance hoping I’d fall and die a tragic death. I could have died a hero, but no, Ben had to save my life once again. Then Ben was made to stay behind to keep the door open. I voted Mitch, but no one listens to me. When Abigail tried to make us all I go, I tried to refuse. I couldn’t let Ben die. He has a life, potential. I have nothing. Then I went under the water to save his life and what do I get…nothing. You see, now I’m getting pissed. Sigh, no use going into any of that. Let’s get back to my actual problem. So I love this guy who could care less about me. I can’t sit around and ache for him any longer. What do you think I should do? I’m considering things like running away and suicide. No one would miss me either way. I better go before I get any more morose. Maybe I’ll get some sleep. After all, I did just assist in the finding of the City of Gold. I’m entitled to some rest.
Your Humble Hacker,
Riley.
P.S. You guys rock!

Riley checks over his work and deems it acceptable before posting it. Then he shuts down his laptop and heads to his room for that well-deserved rest.

Chapter 2

2007-04-28T16:32:05Z

Title: Strangers with RENT
Rating: Pg-13
Pairings: SWC: Chuck/Geoffrey, Jerri/others, RENT: Mark/Roger, Maureen/Joanne
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
A/N: Any words spelled wrong while being sad or thought by Jerri are done so to show her pronunciation.
Summary: While on the run Jerri, Chuck, Geoffrey, and Onyx make their way to New York, and run into the Boho's.

It only took Chuck Noblet less than a minute to realize that his mentor was missing. He scanned the room and spotted Principal Blackman with a large group of what looked like a bunch of homeless people. ‘Oh no,’ Noblet thought, ‘They’ve tricked him into giving them change.’ He decided to grab Geoffrey and Jerri before risking his life for his boss. He found Jerri first. She was hitting on this big black woman. He began to make his way to her when a certain art teacher caught his eye.

Geoffrey was chatting up a young rock start wannabe and Chuck did not like it one bit. The guy was at least 20 years younger than Chuck and he had short blonde hair. His eyes were accentuated we dark eyeliner. Chuck forgot about his former student and stomped his way to Geoffrey’s side.

It took Geoffrey Jellineck a couple of minutes to realize that Roger had stopped listening to him and instead was looking past his shoulder. Geoffrey turned around to see a fuming Chuck Noblet. Geoffrey, the naïve man he was, could not fathom why Chuck was looking so frustrated. “Umm…Chuck, are you alright?” Geoffrey asked hesitantly.

“Why don’t you introduce me to your…friend?” Chuck said and hurt was evident in his voice when he said the word “friend”.

“Oh! Chuck this is Roger Davis. He’s a rock star.” If Chuck was not pissed before he was now. Is that what Geoffrey wanted? Something he would never be? Before he could say anything more, a loud crash was heard throughout the café. Everyone turned towards the sound and the sight was not a pretty one.

“Carry on my wayward son!” Jerri Blank sand loudly and off key. She was obviously drunk, or high, or both. Blackman sighed and got up to help the whore. He tried to grab her arm, but she evaded him and ended up on the floor. Blackman motioned for Noblet and Jellineck to help him. Between the three of them they got her up and standing on her own two feet.

Noblet and Jellineck lead her to the exit while Blackman said goodbye to his newfound friends.

“I have to go and deal with the junkie whore over there.” He said to Maureen. She sighed dramatically and then her eyes lit up with the most brilliant of ideas.

“Do you guys have anywhere to stay? I mean it doesn’t matter where you stay. Just what place.”

“Well we just got here tonight and we haven’t really thought this plan through. So I guess we’re homeless at the moment…why?” Blackman asked with a bit of hope in his voice.

”Well why don’t you guys stay with me? I have more than enough room and that way you could hang out with all of us.”

“That’s a wonderful idea.” Onyx said as he began to sit down again.

“Principal Blackman!” Noblet yelled while trying to hold back an escaping Blank.

“Oh right. I really must go now. One problem, I don’t know where you live or how to get around.”

“That’s okay, we’ll go with you now and I’ll show you around my place.” Maureen winked at that and got up. The rest of her group grumbled about leaving, but got up as well.

Outside, they all said their goodbyes to Maureen and scheduled to hang out tomorrow. Roger pulled Geoffrey aside and spoke in hushed tones, but he was loud enough that everyone could hear him.

“I hope this means we’ll be seeing more of each other. Much more.” Geoffrey blushed as he walked off.

“THE AUDACITY!” Noblet yelled as they began following Maureen. They all looked at him. “What?” He asked sheepishly. Onyx simply glared and put his arm around his new friend while Noblet and Jellineck carted a very intoxicated Blank.

outkast_choir89 @ 2007-04-15T00:30:00

2007-04-15T05:57:29Z

So, it's now Sunday and we have already done two performances for this year's musical. We have done a wonderful job this year and we are sold out! WOOT! The munchkins are great. We've only messed up on little things and due to late entrances us witches have had to do some improvising. We all are really good at it though. Tomorrow, or today rather, is our last day and I'm sad. Our seniors will be leaving and I'll miss everyone I see every night. Next year, it'll be my turn to say goodbye to everyone. It's going to be so sad.

Saturday's performance was great. The only thing that went wrong was 3 of us told the people that we like that we like them and all three of us were rejected. It gets better. Ok, I like JC, JC likes Alicia, Alicia likes Zeb, Zeb is undecided, and Megan loves Alicia. It's all screwed up. I'm not too upset about JC not liking me. Ok, I lie. It just plain sucks. He said it would be weird if we dated becuase we're friends. This really blows for all of us. Maybe today things will be better.

Tinks

outkast_choir89 @ 2007-01-28T20:24:00

2007-01-29T02:24:11Z

Well, I haven't updated my blog in awile, so I thought I would. Nothing much has been going on with me. I play the First Witch in the Wizard of Oz', our musical this year. Brynn and I are constantly making fun of all those hXc emo peeps. Haha, we rock our own socks off!! Hmm...I've been watching CNN alot lately and getting interested in politics. Mainly Anderson Cooper 360. By the way, Anderson Cooper is the hottest news anchor ever. Well besides Jon Stewart.

My school is still full of Chickens AKA Hicks. Ugh, I hate it. There is an upside though, they are amusing at times. The teachers are still dumbasses, except Mrs. Crews, Ms. King, Ms. Stephenson, Mr. Scott, Mrs. Bame, and Mr. Murray. (I like WAY too many teachers.)

I am currently dating Coty Lucci, almost a month now. I really like him and he is a great boyfriend. He listens to me whine about anything and everything. He also isn't afraid to speak his mind. I admire that in people. This is the longest relationship I have had in a while. I think he's really good for me. I don't know what my other friends think of him. Or if they think that he is good for me or not. Who cares? I sure don't.

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-12-23T17:29:00

2006-12-23T23:32:09Z

Here's the next chapter of my new SVU Story, Suppressed Denial.

Title: Suppressed Denial 2/?
Author: duh!

The three detectives stood there frozen for a few minutes. None of them were really sure what to do. John broke the stillness by calmly walking past Cassidy and out the doors of the pin. Olivia was the next to move. She gestured for Cassidy to follow her into one of the vacant rooms.

Once inside the room, Benson examined her old friend. He looked at least ten years older than she did. His eyes that used to be so full of life were now…well lifeless. The baggy clothes did nothing to hide his too small frame. It looked as if he hadn’t eaten in awhile. Olivia realized that she was staring so she stopped and sat down across from Brian. “Whose rape would you like to report?” She asked trying to be calm and professional.

“Mine.” Olivia Benson’s jaw dropped for the second time that day. She was in no way prepared for that.

“Excuse me?” She asked just to make sure that she wasn’t hearing things.

“Last night I left the station around 9 p.m. and went to a bar for a few drinks. After I knocked back a few beers I headed home. While walking down an alley near my building I was slammed into a wall by some guy who I didn’t see. He ripped off my clothes and proceeded to…penetrate me. I tried to turn around to get a small glimpse of the attacker, but he grabbed the back of my neck and made it impossible for me to move it. When he was done, the idiot spit on me and told me how pretty I was. I sat in the alley for a while until I gathered enough strength to get home. I wasn’t going to report it at first, but then I remembered seeing a case about a guy who was raped by 3 women and how they didn’t believe him. So here I am. I haven’t had a rape kit done yet. I was kind of hoping that one of you guys would go with me.” It was then that Olivia realized how vulnerable and fragile he was.

“Yeah, of course one of us would go. We should actually do that now. Is there anyone one in particular that you would like to take you?” She saw him hesitate for a moment before he gave her an answer.

“John maybe, if he’s not busy. But-uh he doesn’t have to if he doesn’t want to. If he doesn’t want to then would you take me?”

“Sure, let’s go see if we can find him for you.” She said and led him out of the room.

In the pin things were eerily quiet. There were no paper wads and no one was talking. Benson noticed that Fin and Elliot were actually doing paperwork. “Hey guys,” She began, “Where’s Munch?” Fin shrugged and said that He’d just gotten back with their coffee. “Elliot?”

“No one has seen him since he walked out of here earlier. My guess is…”

“The roof.” Cassidy finished for him. Elliot raised a brow and Olivia just smiled.

“Do you want me to go or…?” Olivia trailed off and awaited her answer.

“I think I should go talk to him. Thanks anyway Liv.” With that, Cassidy proceeded up to the roof.

“Who was that?” Fin questioned once Brian was gone. Before either two could answer, Captain Cragen waltzed into the room.

“Did I just see Brian Cassidy in here, or am I losing my mind?” Cragen asked his detectives.

“Both.” Elliot stated and smirked.

“Very funny Stabler, but seriously what is he doing here?”

Fin was getting a little frustrated, “Who is Brian Cassidy?”

It seemed like no one heard him, because Olivia kept on talking like he wasn’t there. “He was raped captain.” Cragen shook his head in denial.

“No,” he said, “Not Brian. This is some elaborate joke right?”

Elliot looked down and shook his head. Cragen sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Who is this guy?” Fin asked again.

“Brian Cassidy was Munch’s first partner. He left SVU to go to Narcotics.” Olivia informed him.

“Where is he now?” Cragen asked.

“Up on the roof with Jew boy.” Elliot joked, trying to cheer everyone up a little.

TBC…

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-12-23T22:30:00

2006-12-23T22:30:15Z

Not too long ago my teacher PE teacher ran into my English class and told my english teacher that they were going to lunch together. It was more of a demand than anything. It just reminded me so much of Jellineck and Noblet that I decided that I had to write a fic and dedicate it to them.

Title: The Note...In The Pink Envelope...On His Desk. 1/?
Author: Me!
Rating: PG
Warnings: Umm...This could make you "friendly"
Summary: Noblet gets a note from his "friend"...he thinks.
Notes: For My English and PE teacher.

The first thing that Chuck Noblet noticed when he walked into his classroom after lunch was a pink envelope on his messy desk. He figured it was from his “friend”, Geoffrey. When he opened it and read some of the things enclosed in this letter, he began to doubt his first assumption. Geoffrey’s letters were always so romantic and sweet, but this letter in particular was…well let’s just say that it could give Ron Jeremy a run for his money. He quickly placed the note in his desk when the bell rang and his students began to file in. He glared at the kids as they took their seats. He hated all of his students equally. Well, there was one that he loathed with a passion.

“Hey faggot, what’s with the blush?” Speak of the devil. Jerri Blank stood in front of his desk looking smug.

“I’m not blushing. I’m a married man.” He said hoping it would throw her off track. “Take your seat or you’ll get The Hammer!” He growled before she could comment on his comment. Jerri took her seat and he began to teach his students about how Gandhi contracted Syphilis from a goat.

About halfway through his speech, Noblet caught Orlando staring into space at him. “Busted!” He yelled in Orlando’s face. “That’s a detention for not paying attention.”

“But…” Orlando started to protest, “I…”

“Not buts mister, after school for 45 minutes you’re mine.” A blush crept onto Orlando’s face and Chuck looked at him strangely. The lunch bell rang and the students shot up from their seats. “Ok, tomorrow we’ll be discussing how Charles Darwin got Syphilis from his cousin and how it helped in the disaster we call evolution.”

After all the students had gone, Chuck sat down at his desk and thought about the envelope. Maybe Geoffrey had grown some backbone. No, he knew just how much backbone that Geoffrey had and there was plenty. After 3 minutes of thinking and no conclusion, he decided to confront Geoffrey about the note.
Chuck ran all the way to the art room and almost fell over when he skidded to a halt. “Geoffrey!” He exclaimed, out of breath.

Geoffrey Jellineck looked up from his smiley face planner and smiled. “Hey Chuck! I thought you had to go over lesson plans today. Sandwich?” Geoffrey pulled a turkey sandwich out of nowhere and Chuck smirked at how innocent he was.

“Actually I came down here to ask you about that letter you wrote me. Since when did Geoffrey Jellineck have the courage to write something like that?” Geoffrey just stared at Chuck blankly.

“Huh?”

“The note…in the pink envelope…on my desk.” Chuck informed him, praying that it was his “friend” who wrote it.

“Um…Chuck, I didn’t write you any note. Why do you ask? Did you get one?” Geoffrey asked, completely oblivious to the fact that Chuck had just mentioned getting a note.

“No…there’s no note. Why would you think that? Well, I better go call my wife.” He made a hasty escape before Geoffrey said anything. He then decided to not tell Geoffrey about the note that doesn’t exist. A jealous Jellineck wasn’t a pleasant one.

When Chuck re entered his room there was an Orlando sitting on his desk fiddling with his pointer. Chuck cleared his throat and raised a brow. Orlando hopped of the desk and looked at his teacher suddenly nervous. “Well?” Chuck prompted. He just wanted to get back to figuring out whom the note was from.

“Mr. Noblet, did you get my letter?” Chuck Noblet froze.

“Letter?”

“The letter…in the pink envelope…on your desk.” That was about the time that Chuck Noblet learned that knowing nothing is better than knowing everything.

TBC…

New Story!!

2006-10-08T00:29:39Z

Here's an SVU fic I have been working on!

Title: Suppressed Denial
Fandom: SVU
Rating: M
Summary: No one expected this. No one ever does.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Law & Orders.

It was a slow day in the station for the detectives. No one had been raped the night before or today, so they were stuck doing paperwork. Well, they were supposed to be doing paperwork. In all reality they were making paper airplanes and flicking paper wads at each other. They were even handing out fake points. Olivia was in the lead for a wad that bounced off of Munch’s head, hit Fin, and landed in Fin’s wastebasket. That had been the highlight of their day.

Olivia stood up and proceeded to get coffee. She sipped on it and then spit it out. As she walked back to her desk she glared at Munch and demanded that he go buy her coffee. “No. My coffee is just fine. You just have bad taste detective.” He replied.

“Ugh, you can’t even call it coffee. It taste worse than bad Chinese.”

“There is no such thing as bad Chinese.” Elliot chimed in.

Fin just smiled and shook his head at their bickering. He offered to go get Starbuck’s for all of them. After getting their orders Fin was out the door and on his way. Munch flicked a wad at Olivia but she dodged it and the paper wad hit someone else. That someone else just had to be Cragen. Olivia stifled a giggle and Elliot suppressed a laugh of his own.

“Get to work or I’ll make sure that Fin delivers all of the coffee directly to me.” In a second they were all working on some file or another. Cragen smiled in triumph. ‘All it takes is a comment about taking coffee away’ He noted to himself. Now he had ammo against his team. (Cue evil laughter of doom) With that, the captain returned to his office.

After 10 minutes of doing actual work Elliot scanned the room. “Where in the hell if Fin with our coffee?”

“Maybe he got shot again?” John supplied. His fellow detectives gave him a look. “What? It could happen. That’s what’s wrong with you guys. You’re always thinking positive. That’s why you don’t think that they are really out to get you.”

“Who are ‘they’ John?” Olivia gave him a don’t-get-him-started look. Unfortunately it was too late and Elliot had already prompted John to rant about conspiracies.

“They, my dear friend, are the rich soul suckers that we call our government. They are-” He was cut off by the doors to the pin opening. They all turned around expecting to see Fin there with their beloved coffee. What they weren’t expecting was Brian Cassidy standing there with a pallid complexion and a dull look in his eyes. They definitely didn’t expect the words that followed his entrance.

“I want to report a rape.”

~TBC~

Short I know, but more will come.

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-10-03T18:50:00

2006-10-03T23:51:08Z

Been a while since I updated. Nothing much is going on with me. I'm excited that House is back on. Woot! Lol, school is going okay. I have pretty good grades. I hate my English III class. I love the material that we are going over. Whitman, Thoreau, Emerson, my favorites. I just hate the fact that I am the only one who gets it. It is unnerving to hear Finders explain everything while we are reading the poems. He pauses in the middle of selections to explain and ask questions. It is infuriating. I can't wait until next year when we cover British Literature. I love Oscar Wilde. He is my hero when it comes to my writing.

I am not friends with Ames any more. I just got tired of her crap and I stood up for myself. I gots Brynn and Marcus so I'm all good. I still like Drew. Hell I think I love him. He's with Lexis though. That's what I hate about love. It sucks and I try not to fall into the trap of love, but sometimes I don't see the trap and I'm vulnerable. I hate love and love hate. I just wish loev would stay away from me. I'd rather be on my own. Just becuase I'm alone doesn't mean I'm lonely. Besides writers are lonely people. My English II teacher told me that and I believe it.

The musical shall be starting up soon. This year we are doing The Wizard of Oz. Everyone is telling me that I should try out for the part of The Wicked Witch of the West. I'm all like "No I wanna be a flying monkey!" Lol. I can't think about the Wizard of Oz without thinking of Wicked. This year should be good for the musical. It certainly is good for our football team. Friday night was our homecoming. We won against DuQuoin. We haven't beat them since 2001. I think everyone was kinda shocked by the win. Not only did we beat them, but we are currently undefeated. woot!woot! Lol, well I'm out.

Tinks

"Singing a song about a vending machine,
Don't you know that it's really not my scene.
Try to think of something clever with a little twist.
If we do another hoedown I'll slit my fucking wrist!"
-Ryan Stiles-

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-08-09T23:29:00

2006-08-10T04:30:49Z

I haven't updated in a while so I thought I would. I went to register yester day and our lockers are BLUE!!!! They used to be blue/white/beige/and other weird colors. They are ALL blue. Talk about conformity. Anyways, this year should be fun. I have Ms. King again which will be sweet. Mostly, I just cannot wait until the musical this year. Maybe I'll get a main part. I don't know if I want one though. I mean, I'm just content being on stage. I tend to stray away from the spotlight. I haven't figured out if that's good or bad yet.

Not much has been going on lately. My scar started hurting today. I think the scar tissue got stiff and that's what happened. I hate it when that does that. It's hard to accept that my stomach will pretty much hurt my whole life. It's just something I have to learn to deal with. Life sucks like that. Well I am off to sleep now.

Tinks
Quote of the Day:

Life would be so much more interesting
if people randomly broke out into happy songs
in the middle of a crowded street, just like Broadway.

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-07-17T13:35:00

2006-07-17T18:35:47Z

For the past week I have been feeling sick. Not like stuffy nose bad cough sick, but like real sick. I am feeling weak and all I want to do if pass out. I haven't been sleeping that much, I can't. I could be manic, but if I were manic then I would have the high feeling. I definetly don't feel high. I've barely been out of my bed. I've been in bed most of the time watching Whose Line, SVU, and House. I don't know what's wrong with me. I think I am depressed. I don't know why I would be. I mean I have a good life. I have a best friend that everyone wishes for. I have a great family. Ok, I don't have a great family, but I do have a normal one. As normal as any family can be I guess.

I just went up to Amy's to get my pants and RENT back. I missed RENT. I am obsessed and I'll admit it. Ames and I are gonna hang out tomorrow. I know I have been kind of ignoring her lately. I just haven't been feeling up to human contact much. On my way home I saw Drew at Marcus' so I waved. He waved back and it made my day. Is that bad, with one wave/smile he can make me feel so much better. I haven't heard from him since the night we "snuck" out. I don't think he likes me like that. I probably messed things up again like I always do. I'm so stupid. Oh well, I should be used to this by now. It shouldn't still hurt, but it does. I should've listen to my english teacher when he said that writers are lonely people. I hate that, but I am begining to believe that it is true. God, I like Drew so much. I guess I'm not pretty enough, or smart enough, it's probably both. All in all, I'm just not good enough. && that hurts so much. At least he's still my friend, I think. I don't know...UGH! Well I'm gonna go cry and listen to some The Used. Maybe I'll write something. Who knows?

Later,
Tinks.

Death Wish

2006-07-12T01:17:20Z

This weekend was...interesting to say the least. I went to Georgia's sleep over and OMG SHE CANNOT DRIVE!! SHE STOPPED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING HIGHWAY AND STARTED BACKING UP! WTF?!! Then we met Marcus and Drew and had them follow us to georgia's. Well, her car fucked up on the way there and we had to ride to her house with Drew and Marcus. When we got to Georgia's we went outside and hung out. This was at like midnight and Mego and I were by the trampoline with Drew. He was jumping up and down and rapping. God, it was fucking hilarious. Here's his rap, it's probably not entirely how he said it.

"I saw your mom at the grocery store,
She was wearing shorts up to here.
Fuck Yeah!
I turned on MTV and the new Britney Spears video was on.
You know the one where she shows all of her stuff.
I said Fuck Yeah!
I changed the channel and the news came on.
More Iraqi's died.
Fuck Yeah!
The new Alanis Morrisette Album came out,
And Julia Roberts died.
Fuck Yeah!"

And there were various versions. But it was great. Georgia decided that she wanted to date Drew again so she asked me to ask him if she had a chance. So I was like ok whatever. So I did and he was like she's a whore. Lol, we went inside and read Drew's future with Tarot Cards. Then Marcus and Drew had to leave so I decided now's my chance. So I left with them and was glad that I got out of there. So newsflash for anyone who doesn't know, I like Drew. Have since school. Sorry I didn't tell ya Ames! Lol.

I told Drew I liked him and he didn't know what to say. So know we are just getting to know each other. Marcus and Ames are rooting for us to get together. I hope we do. I actually want to open up to him and tell him everything. I want to know everthing about him and I want him to know everything about me. How weird is that? Well that's all for now.

Tinks

Quote of the Day:

oh him..?
he just has the most adorable eyes
you could ever fall for
and the cutest smile
that will take your breath away
he has the ability
to make you laugh;;
everytime he speaks
&& when you look at him
its hard to turn away

outkast_choir89 @ 2006-07-06T17:04:00

2006-07-06T22:05:44Z

Well for the 4th and Brynn & I went up to Murphy for a BBQ and then too see the fireworks. The BBQ was kool. The dude that hosted the BBQ was Jeff and he rocked. He could grill too. There was another dude named Jeff he was ok, but an ass nonetheless. Then there was Tracy, Zack's surrogate dad. He's awesome. All three of them decided that they were going to have a bottle rocket war. It was kinda funny, but scary at the same time. Zack shot one and it landed right by Tracy. Tracy stepped on it and we were all waiting for it to go off. Luckily for him, it didn't. We shot off some more fireworks and then we left for Riverside to see the fireworks.

The fireworks sucked. They were pretty and all but we almost died. Seriously, sparks were coming down and even the kids were like "oh shit!" It was scary and funny. What pissed me off is that BJ didn't get to come. He told me he would go and then he didn't get to. I'm not pissed at him persay, but I am pissed. Next year, Brynn and I are going up to Bald Knob for the 4th. That's all for now.

<3 Tinks

Quote of the day:

Dear mom && dad -
if it makes you happy, then i am fine.
if it makes you sleep at night, i am not suicidal.
If it helps you stay ignorant, the scars that lace my body are not proof of how much slef hatred boils inside me.
If it keeps you from abandoning me, i am not crazy.

I'm a BAMF!!

2006-07-02T04:30:25Z

Ok, Thursday night I went to the concert with Brynn, Amy, and Zack. First Brynn and I "gothed out" and then we picked up Ames and left for Murphy. When we got there, we kidnapped Zack and we went to the mall in Carbondale. This security gaurd got onto us for taking pictures. He said no "Flash photography". THE FLASH WASN'T ON!! Lol. Then we met this kool dude named Will. We ate at the best pizza place EVER. hehe.
We passed the time until the concert. Then when the time came we met up with BJ and Alec at the center. One thing I have to say about the concert...IT SUCKED ASS! It was a rock concert and people we're sitting on the floor talking. I wish we could've stayed to see FailSafe play. They rock, I think. Lol, I have been to two of their shows and haven't seen them play yet. Their drummer, Dan, was nice enough to let me take a picture with him. To make up for the bad concert, we rocked all the way home. I hoped Amy had a good time though. I wish the concert was like the ones we always go to. They rock. That's all I have to say bout' that.

Today I had to go to Aunt Ethel's yearly Fish Fry. So I got to spend my day with my family. Well my dad wasn't there. Near the begining of the fish fry my Aunt Helen got stung by a bee and went into shock. My dad rushed her to the hospital. It was a close one, but she's okay now. Anyway, I got to spend the day with family. I had a exciting conversation about Harry Potter with my Uncle Dan. I went with Noah, Buck, Tyler, Logan, and *growl* Nina over to the play area. That's when she crossed the line with me. She said how much of a bad influence I am. I don't know why she said it she just did. Then I jumped down the stairs and Noah looked like he wanted to do it. We were all like "No Noah!" && she goes, "See told you, you were a bad influence." That pissed me off so fucking much. I mean it's not that I hate her, it's just that I do. Even my dad was pissed. When he got back from the hospital and my mom told him he yelled "what!?" and everyone shut up. My mom and I cracked up laughing and had to calm him down. He was gonna start bitching her out if we didn't. I don't think I'm a bad influence. Quite the contrary. I mean I am sXe, I'm a virgin, I don't lie to my parents...much, and I'm not out getting arrested. She needs to rethink her fucking opinion. I have put up with this for about 2-3 yrs now and I am fucking sick of it. That's all for now.

<3Tinks

Quote of the Day:

she feels like she was lied to.
like that warning in the rearview mirror that says,
"objects are closer than they appear."
she thinks she needs a sign taped to her heart,
"caution: much more broken than i seem."

Boredom Ensues...

2006-06-28T00:25:21Z

So I am sitting here being bored. It's my bro's 21st B-day today and he isn't out drinking. Dumb ass, I would be. I am just sitting here listening to Dane Cook. I guess I should post some stuff about me. I am a 16 yr old who loves Theatre and anything pertaining to it. I am in the yearly high school musical. I love singing, acting, improving, and writing. My fave subjects in school are Chorus and English. My favorite band is Linkin Park. I love Whose Line is it Anyway and Steven's Untitled Rock Show. However my all time favorite show is Law & Order: SVU. I can't really decide what my favorite musical is. I love them all. I enjoy going to concerts and hanging out with friends. Actually I went to the mall yesterday with my best friend Brynn. We got magic wands and played DDR X-treme! Lol! Best Gamecube game ever is Animal Crossing. I can live off Dr. Pepper and sunflower seeds. My most cherished possession is my voice. My sister/mom is Ames R. I love her to death. Well, I gtg for cake and ice cream!

</3 TINKS P.S. WATERMELON IS THE ONLY FLAVOR OF JOLLY RANCHER!!